washwords

Oh Hai. Remember me?

Probably not, save the five of you faithful friends who keep checking lo these many weeks. And mom. Hi mom! Shout out to mom!!!

Anywho, it’s been more than a month I’m sad to say and I don’t even have a good excuse. Just… well… life.  In a good way, life has been…. happening!  It’s allllll good. No, seriously, it’s ALL good, really good, joyousness.

I’m getting married, moving in finalllllly with my love (shh, don’t say anything. you’ll jinx it), have reconnected with tons of old friends (thanx facebook!), and making new ones in the way i love best, through long shared writing (thanks election and funny long political email chains enabling bright fun people to reveal their best selves).

And even better… good is all around me. Babies are being born, brides seem to be multiplying all around me, my beloved niece “bucket” is starting to talk and make faces and have a spirit, a true self.

Work is quieting down, papers are starting to fall into place and although there’s one final step left (or two) towards my much-anticipated new chapter, I am starting to breathe again.

Because the other thing is… the reason it was so hard to be here, especially so in October… is because it’s tough to be apolitical (as my government job and all journalistic jobs before it) require when it matters so much. So very much. I’m a cynic (again, job requirement of journalism); I voted how I voted and hoped for the best but inside I was unconvinced it really truly mattered. Until this time. When it did. When it does.

And I am breathing again.

Yes, the economy is bad; yes, we’re feeling it directly and see plenty hit harder everyday; yes, much like my much-anticipated next personal chapter we’re a step, or two, or twelve away. But it’s coming.  I can feel it. And I can breathe again.

The Mommy-track post, or as Maggie Dammit would say, the post in which I lose several readers (in a fiery rage? she didn’t say that part). Anywho, back to my point, which was… am I evil for resenting a “New Parent Community of Practice” recently (heh) spawned at work? Don’t answer yet. Let me explain.

I. Let’s say one works at a federal government agency. Let’s say said anonymous Place of Employment offers flextime, telecommuting, maternity leave, paternity leave, on-site (good) day care, part-time schedules, family-friendly sick leave, use of sick leave and annual leave towards extended maternity/paternity leave, etc.

Photo by N. Farnsworth as printed on Flickr.

II. Let’s further say Place of Employment is a place where work is analytical and done in teams in a Read more »

Green. Green is lush, rich, rolling meadow morning softness. Green is enviro -friendly, future-oriented, the color of money, the color of life, of springtime, gems - emerald , malachite, jade.

Photo “Please don’t move” by Zespira L. on Flickr

But green is deep, sneaky, possessive, emerald powerful jealousy.

Green is the dark hate I feel for girls who get to wear short skirts without puffy ankles or knees.
Green is someone else getting the call, the moment, the power.
Green is the sickening despair of not being noticed, not being enough, not mattering.
Green is stronger, less forgiving then blue.

It cannot see its dewy deep beauty, which is too bad. Strong as it is, it could be so much stronger, if it could see.
Green. Green has so much.