Tag Archive for WW friends

Fall Fever: It will be okay

Spring fever, senioritis, skipping school comes easy, with it’s familiar laughter, shedding of clothes, spreading of blankets on hills, dipping of toes into pools, opening of windows.

But fall comes with it’s own maladies it seems and they are ones of coldness, layering, shuttering, shutting down.  For all around me, we are bundling, shuttering, closing down, shutting off.

Maybe it’s THIS fall. This fall with the economy plummeting, the campaigns becoming hostile and in some cases disturbing. This fall with the temperature literally changing from 80 degrees to 30 Fahrenheit in a day. This fall, with the war casualities and injuries mounting, this Fall with the flu and cold strains bouncing around from person to person.

Or maybe it’s just the people I know. Maybe it’s Washington and our obsession with polls and stats and debates. Maybe it’s my friends, one facing the prospect of losing her cat really more of a “spiritual guide,” the constant who saw her through boyfriends, and friends, and changes of cities and marriage and baby-wanting,

"Habib on the prowl" photo, courtesy of Suz Redfearn

"habbib on the prowl," Suz Redfearn

and baby-bringing-home – Habbib.

Another friend asked recently “Is there such a thing as pre-partum depression?”

So maybe it’s us.

But me? I am getting married, I’m in love with a wonderful man who loves me back, I’m writing again (watch this space for snippets of “all the boys I’ve loved before” for my work-in-progress novella, “Red Line to Dumpsville: My Year of Dating in Washington D.C.”), getting good feedback on that writing, getting published and broadcast and awarded. I have a good job, with raises every year, and more importantly respect and friendship of peers I admire in turn.

And I’m sad, too.  And I don’t know why.

So we ride it out, we cuddle and hunker down together, we sing songs loudly,  we tell jokes and giggle. We bring friends our friends, bring love our love, bring hearts our hearts. And wait, trust in the universe, and know: this too shall pass.

My friend is in what she calls “pregrieving” for Habbib, the gentlemanly little man-cat who chose to live with her these past 15 years, with his curmudgeonly face but spirit of anything but grump. I told her what I very much know to be true, that whatever happens with Habbib that maybe he is preparing to go because he knows he can: she’ll be okay now. She got that love she was seeking and the beautiful baby, the loving husband, the security and full cup of love in the world. But sure as I am that Habbib is sure she’ll be okay, I’m equally sure that he won’t be gone, not forever, not really, even if physically. He’ll be sending her signs from wherever he is for years and years to come.

My dad does so all the time.  The year after he died I wanted to go on a trip to Spain – my mom was worried -I was just 13; we had just bombed Libya, she was a newly single parent. In the parking lot of our neighborhood drug store she saw an exact doppelganger copy of my dad’s old car: the fairly unique VW rabbit, beige. The license plate? “ITS OK.” No, I’m not kidding.

And it was, I went on that trip. Habbib may say his adieus to the the grassy patch he plays on and the laptops he likes to sleep on. We will hurt and get better and fall down again and laugh and cry and love and sometimes hate and then remember it is so much better to love. And the sun will rise and fall. And it will be O.K. Promise.

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If it’s Wednesday, it must be cupcakes

So I’m a week late, but here I am, apolitical Washwords, blogging, as promised, about cupcakes.

(See, I can be sweet!)

I have a regularly scheduled appointment every Wednesday (it lasts 50 minutes) at a place near the fabbbulous newly opened Hello Cupcake. They sell… you guessed it: cupcakes! Yes, they’re pricey; yes, they are the kind of thing I might blog about as being the worst kind of emperor’s-new-clothes pretentious (ohh I HAVE to have that $3.00 cupcake! in the brown box tied up with string!)


I DO have to have it. Hello Cupcake’s cakes are pretty. They have pretty names (Peanut Butter Blossom, Peppermint Penny, De Lime and De Coconut); they have pretty colors (Easter egg pinks and greens and buttercreamy white and tan); and yes, they come in pretty brown boxes with pink stickers.


they’re delicious.

So… I’ve started a new tradition. Every Wednesday when I go to my Regularly Scheduled Appointment, I bring back cupcakes (sometimes 4, sometimes 6) to deserving fellow workerbee pals. Because let’s face it, someone could ALWAYS use a cupcake.

Response has been amazing. In the last few weeks I’ve given cupcakes to:

* Pals finishing hellatious, hellatious jobs that have Read the rest of this entry »

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X365: Micro-essays (on not-micro people)

Micro-essays Five through Ten of my 35/365 project.

What’s 35/365 or x365? See here.

5/365 Ben: Two years old. At bedtime, under your covers, after stories, after water and teethbrushing for you and your brother, you tell me, “but I still have words to say.” I remember this 20 years later.

6/365:”Yellow-Line Friend, 2005″ He won’t be coming to the airport, so I take the train through the winter morning, 2005. I can’t stop crying. You hand me a tissue and say it will get better. I believe you.

7/365: Mr. Marusa: In fifth grade, I wonder if I can become an author when I grow up. You say I have talent, and (NOT “but”) that the future is up to me. Thank you for the “and.”

8/365: Joserra: “Do you know of a band, the J. Giles Band? I think that this is most excellent American band, don’t you??” My Basque country hiking guide, you coached me well, guiding me in laughing again.

9/365 Roald Dahl: In Europe, when I was six, we devoured your books. “Danny, the Champion…” Dad read in our Dutch apartment, “James and the Giant Peach,” waiting for the ferry. They were funny and smart and home.

10/365: Matt: You say “You just don’t know how much I need you.”  But I do.
Your need is mine for your strong arms, laughing storytelling, and warm, pure heart enveloping mine. Thank you for finding me.

See here for the complete set as it evolves: http://washwords.com/words/35×365

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