Fall Fever: It will be okay

Spring fever, senioritis, skipping school comes easy, with it’s familiar laughter, shedding of clothes, spreading of blankets on hills, dipping of toes into pools, opening of windows.

But fall comes with it’s own maladies it seems and they are ones of coldness, layering, shuttering, shutting down.  For all around me, we are bundling, shuttering, closing down, shutting off.

Maybe it’s THIS fall. This fall with the economy plummeting, the campaigns becoming hostile and in some cases disturbing. This fall with the temperature literally changing from 80 degrees to 30 Fahrenheit in a day. This fall, with the war casualities and injuries mounting, this Fall with the flu and cold strains bouncing around from person to person.

Or maybe it’s just the people I know. Maybe it’s Washington and our obsession with polls and stats and debates. Maybe it’s my friends, one facing the prospect of losing her cat really more of a “spiritual guide,” the constant who saw her through boyfriends, and friends, and changes of cities and marriage and baby-wanting,

"Habib on the prowl" photo, courtesy of Suz Redfearn

"habbib on the prowl," Suz Redfearn

and baby-bringing-home – Habbib.

Another friend asked recently “Is there such a thing as pre-partum depression?”

So maybe it’s us.

But me? I am getting married, I’m in love with a wonderful man who loves me back, I’m writing again (watch this space for snippets of “all the boys I’ve loved before” for my work-in-progress novella, “Red Line to Dumpsville: My Year of Dating in Washington D.C.”), getting good feedback on that writing, getting published and broadcast and awarded. I have a good job, with raises every year, and more importantly respect and friendship of peers I admire in turn.

And I’m sad, too.  And I don’t know why.

So we ride it out, we cuddle and hunker down together, we sing songs loudly,  we tell jokes and giggle. We bring friends our friends, bring love our love, bring hearts our hearts. And wait, trust in the universe, and know: this too shall pass.

My friend is in what she calls “pregrieving” for Habbib, the gentlemanly little man-cat who chose to live with her these past 15 years, with his curmudgeonly face but spirit of anything but grump. I told her what I very much know to be true, that whatever happens with Habbib that maybe he is preparing to go because he knows he can: she’ll be okay now. She got that love she was seeking and the beautiful baby, the loving husband, the security and full cup of love in the world. But sure as I am that Habbib is sure she’ll be okay, I’m equally sure that he won’t be gone, not forever, not really, even if physically. He’ll be sending her signs from wherever he is for years and years to come.

My dad does so all the time.  The year after he died I wanted to go on a trip to Spain – my mom was worried -I was just 13; we had just bombed Libya, she was a newly single parent. In the parking lot of our neighborhood drug store she saw an exact doppelganger copy of my dad’s old car: the fairly unique VW rabbit, beige. The license plate? “ITS OK.” No, I’m not kidding.

And it was, I went on that trip. Habbib may say his adieus to the the grassy patch he plays on and the laptops he likes to sleep on. We will hurt and get better and fall down again and laugh and cry and love and sometimes hate and then remember it is so much better to love. And the sun will rise and fall. And it will be O.K. Promise.

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  1. Some guy named "me" said,

    Wrote on October 10, 2008 @ 4:25 pm

    Habbib and I met only a few times, but he sure is a great cat. A very nice tribute, washwords.

  2. Doug said,

    Wrote on October 17, 2008 @ 9:34 am

    Awwww… cute cat!

    Good post 🙂

    Dougs last post: Bullshit of the Day

  3. JC said,

    Wrote on October 21, 2008 @ 2:56 pm

    It certainly feels like Fall all of the sudden.

    I stopped by because I wanted to make sure you caught the contest I’m running over at On the Red Line. It’s for a good cause–the Crohn’s and Colitis Foundation:


  4. Jon said,

    Wrote on October 27, 2008 @ 12:43 pm

    You’ve won an award. Check out my blog for details.

    Jons last post: Let’s Hear It For The Boy

  5. jakill said,

    Wrote on October 29, 2008 @ 5:53 am

    I came from Jon’s blog. So glad he tagged you and I followed. This is a lovely post with a lovely message.

    jakills last post: A Poem

  6. washwords said,

    Wrote on October 30, 2008 @ 8:19 pm

    oh wow. and here I’ve been blogadaisical. I’m coming back. I promise. Solly everybody! Thanks for the award and your support.

    your bloggy pal in absentia,


    washwordss last post: Fall Fever: It will be okay

  7. Meredith said,

    Wrote on November 24, 2008 @ 5:38 pm

    Oh, what a handsome boy. I have done the “pre-grieving” process for pets before and it never makes it any easier when they go. I’m sorry your friend is worrying so much. I’m sure my three girls will be looking out for Habbib on the other side of the rainbow bridge. They will want to meet such a good-looking older gentleman!

    (I know the rainbow bridge stuff is cheesy, but I’ve found it comforting when I’ve lost pets.)

  8. Hubert Teixeira said,

    Wrote on November 19, 2011 @ 5:25 pm

    Artemus Ward~ Why is this thus What is the reason for this thusness

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